Have been sitting around recovering from a hernia operation for the last week and half. My wife picked me up a book to keep my spirts up.
The book is called Non Campus Mentis and is a compilation of college student essays by Professor Anders Henriksson.

It is quite hilarious how the world's history can be so mangled.

Here are a couple of funnier bits:

Medieval Times:

"During the Middle Ages everyone was middle aged. People lived in or near the soil. Most were kept busy sewing the crops. Surfs were dentured and bonded to the ground. In times of crisis the serfs would seek refuse in the lord's castle."

and another,

"In the 1400 hundreds most Englishmen were perpendicular. A class of yeowls arose. Revolters ran apluck. Women were nowhere to be found. Martin Guerre, a French pesent, did not even seem to care if his wife produced a hare."

Now on to the Renaissance...

"Henry VIII divorced his original wife, who had become old and impregnable. Elizabeth I was eventually the daught of Henry the Ate. Mother to Elizabeth was Ann Beau Lynne, wife of the moment to Henry VIII. As queen, Elizabeth was the foremost monarch of the Elizabethan era. In 1588 she calmed her soldiers during a Spanish attack by assuring them that she shared a stomach with her father."

....and a few funny bits about the explorers....

. Balboa was first to lay down his eyes on the Rocky Mountains.
. Dick Cavett was the first European to visit Newfoundland.
. Cabot discovered the Netherlands and codfish.
. Captain Cook found many continents while deliberately on exhibition and located the perfect navel spot near Africas's bottom."

And then came Modernism....

"Friedrich Nietzsche was a German movie producer who wrote Triumph of the the Will and Superman."

"Culture fomented from Europe's tip to it's top. Art plopped off the deep end and sailed up the creek without a paddle. Cubism, splatterism, etc. became the rage."

And leading up to the The Great War....

"The German takeover of All-Sauce Lorrain enraged the French, who clamored for vendetta."

"The Russian revolution of 1905 began about 1907. Unfortunately, the Czar was easily influenced by flutterers. The Triple Alliance faced NATO. This too was produced by Bismarck, who worked for Caesar at the time."

And then there's recent history....

"North Africa is the region which lies in the northern part of Africa. It is therefore not in Africa. Without a dout this was the Middle East, where all bets were misplaced. Arab leaders ran head in tail with the Soviets."

"One major source of conflict since World War II has been Israel's relations with the Parisians. The Carter administration found itself face to face with this problem during the so called Iran Hostess Crisis."

"East and West made mends with each other. The Berlin Mall was removed. Many Eastern Europeans experienced a new form of arousal at this time."

And there are more and more. I have not stopped laughing.

Pick up the book if you get a chance.