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--General Electric.

Customer: 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! -- TV: Monty Python's Flying Circus (The Pet Shop Sketch)

The outcome is usually the same for an optimist or a pessimist, but the optimist has a more enjoyable time waiting...

"Give a man a fire and he will be warm for a night - set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life"

Terry Pratchett

Some Scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe. -- Frank Zappa

Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is. The most important product of his effort is his own personality.
- Erich Fromm

Teachers open the door, but you must enter by yourself.
- Chinese Proverb

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
- Leo Tolstoy

As long as the mind is seeking to fill itself, it will always be empty. When the mind is no longer concerned with filling its own emptiness, then only does that emptiness cease to be.
- J. Krishnamurti

Learn from the mistakes of others, you can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
- John Luther

BBC Voiceover: We interrupt this program to annoy you and make things generally irritating. -- Monty Python

Life is Living anything else is a sad simulation...

It's true that misery loves company. If you ever doubt
that, look at a No-Pest Strip. It's COVERED with flies.
You'd think that the FIRST fly would tell any others
"GO AROUND! GO AROUND!..."

"A little more moderation would be good. Of course, my life hasn't exactly been one of moderation."
- Donald Trump